Giving life etc.

I'm trying to write the story of what happened when Una was born, just over four months ago, but I am struggling. I absolutely love reading and talking about births, other peoples experiences as well as my own. But for some reason I am finding it difficult to write about what happened. Maybe because it was so different from my expectations. Maybe because I sometimes feel like I didn't "do" that well. Even though my head knows labour is not a performance that you can do well or less well at, my heart still carries around some vague feeling of failure. Maybe because my experience was so traumatic that I sometimes feel nauseous when thinking about it in detail. But mainly it's because it feels so private. So exposing. The same way I feel slightly embarrassed talking about the injuries I sustained during my labour, I suppose it seems so related to sex and your private parts (worst expression ever). At the same time, when I read other people's birth stories I never feel as if they're getting a bit too personal or exposing too much. I guess it's about finding a balance, perhaps you don't need to include every gory detail to tell the full story. Hopefully I will get there in the end.